Trail of Terrible

Saturday night my friend, my sister and I went to Trail of Terror. I'm glad I went but I won't go again.


1. It's really out there. It was about 25 miles away. Then the you are led on a dirt road for at least a mile to a bumpy, holey ground to park on. You're trying to salvage your car by going slowly over these craters while the parking lot attendants are yelling at you to "keep moving, keep moving"! Aaahhhh! The pressure!

2. Once you get to the main events area it's lit bright with flood lights. The air is polluted with off-key, screaming karaoke.

3. 90% of the people there are between the age of 14 and 18.

4. The lines are horrendous. We waited about 45 minutes for the maze and an hour and five minutes for the hay ride. The maze was worth it, the hay ride wasn't. The lines to some of the attractions criss-crossed and went far beyond the entrances.

People are let in in groups of 4 or less. We were waiting in line to walk through "The Butcher". We were standing there for about five minutes shuffling along. All of a sudden a couple girls join the two girls in front of us. Okay, fine. Groups of four or less. Next thing about 3 more join them and then a couple guys. Now there are eight additional kids in front of us making the group 10.

Uh no. I say something to them about the end of the line being "way back there". One girl (about 16-17 years old) says that "we're with them". Hm. So my friend moves in front of them, and tells us to join her. We go up there and the kids are all up in arms about it. We explain to them that you can't have eight people join you in line. One girl says, "but they're with us. We're all together". Blank stares. Then one girls says, "Just go, go ahead of us. Whatever". My friend goes on to explain to them that it isn't her fault that their parents didn't raise them right... something about she has a kid at home older than all of them and if she ever acted like them, her kid isn't too old to get a whoppin'. She was on a roll. I'm standing there thinking, I'm too old for this. Don't do it, don't join... plus, I didn't want to say the things I wanted to say in front of my sister who had to be mortified since she is the same age as the group of kids. I was a little mortified myself.

After a few minutes it all kind of went away. But then it happened again in the Maze line. This time a group of high school guys ducked under the ropes and cut, literally, in front of about 100 people. I asked if they were seriously going to cut in front of every single person behind us. They got cocky and said, "Oh, I've been waiting here for 30 minutes saving a place in line". My friend got loud and got them to move back a few groups.

As we stood in line for the hay ride we got to zig-zag through the ropes and listen in on a lot of different conversations. At one point we were standing by a girl that was about 15-16 and a couple of her friends. One of her friends was telling her someone was talking about her. Instant attitude, "Who? Who's talkin' 'bout me? I will tell them 'bout themselves" As the line moved and she moved with it we heard the end of the threats, "I will shit on their head".

Really?