Run, Fat Girl, Run

Starting today I'm going to attempt to run again.
In the spring of 2004, I ran for three months, challenging myself every step of the way.  I lost weight and felt good.  Then one day I ran and I just became thoroughly exhausted only five minutes in.  I was horribly fatigued for several weeks.  I stopped - for good.  Turns out it was my thyroid levels that were out of whack.  By the time I got them back to where they should be I lost interest in running.  I was afraid of getting that intense fatigued feeling again.
All these years I've talked about starting again but, well, I was lazy.  Now that I've been working out consistently for the past six weeks or so, I'm feeling stronger and motivated.  I'm ready to add to my workout.
Thanks to Laurie's blog I'm determined to start again.  Also on her blog I found a link to another blog and according to this schedule, I'm going to work my butt off - quite literally.
Tonight I started on the treadmill at the gym.  Booooring!  I knew I didn't like running on a treadmill but it was late and dark out and it was my only option (other than putting it off another day).  So, I will definitely be taking this to the great outdoors.
After my run/walk, I stopped at Kohl's and bought a new sports bra, socks and workout shorts.  I will need to buy new running shoes but what I have now will due for a couple weeks.
Wish me luck!
Now I have to work on my playlist...

My mom, the "copter" pilot

My mom and stepdad were in Hawaii this past Feb. for a few weeks (yeah, they got it like that).  My mom, who is terrified of heights sent me this text:

I'm going to be a helicopter pilot.
We went on one w/o doors.
Steve cried like a little girl.

She also said later texted later that if she had her "copter license" she could get somewhere faster.

Me: I don't think anyone would fly with a pilot that calls a chopper a "copter".

Momma: The one with the license can call it whatever they want.

I love my momma.

I deserve the world handed to me on a platter.

I deserve someone who wants to be with only me.
I deserve someone who adores me.
I deserve someone who can't wait to see me again.
I deserve someone who thinks about me all day, missing me, and lets me know.
I deserve someone who doesn't make excuses.
I deserve someone who is better.

I know, this is getting depressing.  Just imagine if you had to listen to this in your head all day.  It gets damn exhausting, I tell you.  I'm too old for this, I should know better by now.  Tsk.

long week of too much brain activity

This has been the longest week ever.  I'm pretty sure there have been several hours added to each day and I'm pretty sure the hours have been longer than 60 minutes each.  I don't know if this is legal.
Many of those extra hours I have spent staring off into space, deep in thought or hardly thinking.  Sometimes trying to close my eyes for sleep that doesn't come.
Distractions are good to keep my mind off "things" but I'm someone who sometimes needs to be alone to let all the thinking out.

I'm a hooper

Hula hooper that is.

About a week and a half ago I bought a weighted hula hoop. A friend of mine ordered one and I had to get one for myself. A coworker of hers has been using one for about three weeks and has already lost about two inches off her waist.

I tried hooping a few years ago and couldn't keep the hoop up. And before that it had been since high school at least.

I bought the four pound Acu hoop, started last Tuesday at one minute and have worked my way up to about three and a half minutes.



Directions say to only do one to three minutes the first week. The second week three to five. Eventually working your way up to two ten minute sessions a day, never doing more than 20 minutes a day.

I took measurements before starting and will wait until four weeks to take them again.

Stay tuned...

A un-wide range of emotion

Blah.
Ick.
Phooey.
Crap.
Dangit.
Son of a biscuit.
Sniffle.
Wah.

And that's all I've got to say about that.

speed bump ahead

I have never had thick skin when it came to matters of the heart. It's who I am. I'm sensitive.

I went in feeling tough with walls built high and strong then gradually, bit by bit, I let down the walls I spent far too long building. I won't lie, as the walls came down it felt good. There was a certain feel of relief, comfort and, surprisingly, security. I could breathe and the air was fresh and I wanted to keep breathing it. I felt confident and secure and was having fun.

I let the walls down and now I'm in trouble.

I'm struggling with what I allow myself to do from here. I may loose my common sense and make decisions with my heart rather than my mind. Will the decisions I make hurt me more? Is this just a bump in the road, a stupid, arrogant, self-absorbed, oblivious, thoughtless, clueless, bump in the road?

DIY ADD

Seems I have a problem and it's become quite apparent. I've got too much going on at one time.

I love DIY projects but this time I've taken on more than I can handle.

I tiled my entry way - a 25 sq ft area - a couple of weeks ago. I still have a bit of a mess to pick up from it.

Last Friday I put in a new bathroom sink. I can't get it to stop leaking. Everything that was under the sink is spread out in the bathroom.

I painted a mirror frame in the middle of it all.

I've decided not take on any more projects until I get my shit together.

Oh, I've got a brilliant closet plan in the works...

Sox

This is the email I received from my mom this afternoon:

I have 49 pairs of socks, not including those knee high black or white
trouser stockings. I think I will go get another pair to make it an
even 50. No. Wait. Maybe you want some of my old socks. Gosh, let
me know.

I'm hoping she's just going through and thinning out her clothes. Otherwise, why would one count socks?

And no, I don't want her socks.