Done. Finished. Completed. Gone.

I am so happy! So relived. Life is worth living again.

I resigned from the board. I could have just stepped down but I wanted out. I have been overloaded with making decisions I don't care about. Or, I want someone else to make because, really, I'm tired of people griping about the money spent but don't take the time to come to meetings and understand the whats and whys.

I'm tired of asking Former President to stop jingling her keys during the meetings. I LOVE that another board member told a woman she didn't appreciate her sarcasm. I'm tired of being grossed out by a particular board member's herniated bellybutton sticking out from his pregnant belly through his tight shirt. (gag!) I'm tired of wondering what shape Mary's mind will be in when she comes to a meeting. Will she be happy? Confused? Jolly? Irritated? Tell us how wonderful we all are? Or will she, like last time, say, "I know you're sitting up there in your princess chair but I'd like to see Former President back on the board". Then sit and glare at me. Really? Princess. I think Queen.

I'm tired of the politics, the babysitting, the scolding, and the decisions that directly make another person's life miserable.

I don't want to spend five minutes deciding what color a suggestion box should be and another five discussing if the clip board that holds the paper next to it should be pink, purple, green or blue.

Therefore, beginning December 1st I am no longer a board member but "simply" a homeowner. I can now stick out my tongue at Mary's back without getting in trouble.

NNO

Our association had it's National Night Out gathering this evening. We didn't expect many people and rightly so, only about 20 people showed. We just ordered some pizzas and let people know they could bring something to share.

It's odd, sometimes, what people will bring. This evening we got:

Two pans of brownies
Two boxes of Little Debbie Hunny Buns
A already opened can of smoked almonds
A Baggie of leftover? tortilla chips with salsa
Rice Krispie bars
Beer & pop

Our last little potluck someone brought two single servings of potato salad and some turkey almond salad from a deli and an opened, half-eaten bag of blue tortilla chips.

Needless to say, this is why I have a hard time eating at potlucks with people I don't know.

I may have just saved my neighbors' lives.

This could be the one thing that saves my sanity... my life. I got ridiculously happy when I watched this. I saw hope. I heard birds sing. I did a happy dance. This could change my life and those of my upstairs neighbors. Ohhhh, watch the whole thing. It's so beautiful!

How to Repair Squeaky Floors Through Carpeting Video Floors This Old House

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False alarm

The other day I came home and there was a moving truck in the front of my building. The people that live upstairs from me were standing outside of it. I got a thrill, they're moving out! They are going to stop stomping on my head until 12:30 am every night.

Wait, they're taking the stuff OFF the truck? They're suppose to be putting the stuff ON the truck then driving it far, far away.

The only things I can think of is that more furniture means less open space for the little boy to run around in, more furniture means something to absorb the sound, more furniture means some weight on the creaky floor.

More furniture means they're staying for a while.

Rearing it's ugly head again

Anxiety that is.
I'm starting to feel really icky about many things. It's horrible where I live as far as the noise goes. I can't find a job and that's starting a mild panic in me. I don't want to be on the board of my association anymore.
All of these things have resolutions but some come with complications.
I have to fight the upstairs neighbors daily and that is wearing on my nerves. I'm tired and on edge.
I can resign from the board but I feel a certain amount of obligation to them... yet at the same time I don't give a crap.
Searching for a job day after day after day with no results is frustrating and doesn't make me feel valued.
After many weeks of feeling like crying but with no release... I cried. It's how my anxiety and frustration comes out. I cry because I feel helpless and stupid and lost and weak and miserable. Crying somehow lets some of those feeling escape or become not so urgent. I have been waiting for a good cry.
I'm getting that feeling of wanting to run away. I want to move to a smaller city/town where the population isn't bearing down on me. Not just a vacation but a permanent escape.
I need peace.

I had a little blowout

With my upstairs neighbor that is.
Last Thursday I left during the day to escape the constant noise. Later that night... or should I say early the next morning, at 12:20 am I tried calling and asking her to be quiet. Her phone went right to voicemail. Grrrr! The noise had been ongoing since 9:30 pm. I got dressed, went upstairs, knocked on the door and said in a stern voice, "It's 12:20 in the morning".
She didn't get it.
Me: You need to be quite now.
Her: I don't know what else I can do.
Me: How about set a decent bedtime so he's not running around at midnight.
Her: He's not running around.
Me: Whatever he or you are doing is too much.
Her: He's 18 months old. He gets up to go to the bathroom.
Me: Something has got to change. This is getting to be a real problem.
Her: What do you want me to do, move?
Me: Hey! Go for it!
Her: Are you going to pay my rent?
Me: It's time to keep it down.

Five minutes later it was quite. I am at a complete loss. In the less than two months she has lived there I've had to go knock on her door four times and call her five times. All calls are 11 pm or later.
Also, what 18 month old little boy is potty trained so well that he wakes himself up in the middle of the night and uses the bathroom????
Liar.

Private Viewing

I was the only one to buy a ticket for the 3:05 showing for Sunshine Cleaning. Good movie.

The reason I went to a movie was because I had to get out of my place since the person who lives upstairs has no concept of community living. The stomping and pounding and thumping and heavy walking and two-year-old running is far beyond what I can stand. It's alllll day everyday. I've called many times (usually because it's still going on around 10:30, 11:00 and as late [early] as 12:40 am). Today I noticed that Rosco was and has been tearing his fur out on his chest. I believe cats do this when they are stressed and anxious. Poor guy jumps and scats with every thump. I don't blame him. I'm near tearing my hair out as well.

Another meeting from the 'Twilight Zone'

My condo association had its annual meeting on Monday night. The main purpose of the meeting is to vote new officers on the board. This year two positions were up for election (I will try to make this the short version) . There were four people who nominated themselves. One got elected with a more than half the votes. Another only had 15 votes. The other two had 41 and 53 votes. The problem is that the ballots were counted four times and a different number came up each time.

While the counting and recounting is going on “S” (who is running for the board) comes up to me, “how was your vacation”? I tell her it was great, really relaxing. She sits down next to me and in a low voice says, “do you remember that meeting we had?” I remembered. “So, what happened? Hmmm?” She was staring me down completely trying to intimidate me. Apparently she was under the impression that I was going to collect all the proxy votes and make sure the votes went to her. I told her that wasn’t what I said I’d do. She said, “oh, you’re going to renege?” What’s to renege? I didn’t say that. “Are you denying you said that?” Uh, yeah. “Oh. Huh. I see,” she says with a real condescending tone. “’B’ is my witness, she heard you say you‘d promise; no problem”. Of course “B” wasn’t standing beside her supporting her. I would never make a promise to rig the voting. She must have taken the wrong medication that day.
So, she gets up trying to give me the impression that I completely betrayed her, lied to her, stabbed her in the back. What kind of adult (she’s in her mid 50’) behaves this way? As she walks away I salute her (I know, what kind of adult behaves that way?!) Her buddy “B” is looking at me, tight lipped. I shake my head at her and roll my eyes. I was completely put off by the both of them and couldn’t care less what they thought of me. Screw her.
Luckily she didn’t win the second position.
Now, the one who came out on top the board was really excited about. He has a background in accounting and we really need someone in the Treasurer’s position who knows their stuff. I congratulate him and casually ask him if there is a particular position he is interested in (we decide at the next meeting who is going to be in which position). I’m the president and don’t like the position. It comes with a lot of stress. But, do I want anyone else in the position? I thought I didn’t mind until the new member said he’d like to be President. I actually laughed because I thought he was kidding. He wasn’t. So I said, sure, why not. We’ll talk about it at the next meeting and take a vote. He made some comments to another board member about how he could “oversee” the treasurer’s position as president. He said, “in order to get the things done that I want done, I need to be in a higher position.” Wha?
The other board members and I agree that a person’s first year on the board shouldn’t be in the position of the president’s position. We also all agree that there are some red flags with that comment. Especially since “S” was whispering to him all night.
To be continued… this could get good.

Slack-a-lacker

I have been busy with my new duties as president on my association board. We're getting ready for an election in March and things are changing... for the good. There has been some bad blood between many, many homeowner's and the previous president. Since she's stepped down and will not be running for a new term people are rejoicing. They are contacting me with ideas and concerns and want to help. This is what I thought would happen all along. It's exciting and scary at the same time. Suddenly I have a ton of responsibility. This is good experience for me though and I'm hoping I can live up to the hype.

February 1st I had the honor of becoming my niece's godmother.

Ummm... okay...

New developments.

No severance today.

No vacation pay today.

Possibly Tuesday.

I'm thouroughly pisssed.

I'm kind of numb.

Maybe I'll contract for a time.

Get my hopes up?

Better not.

Looking forward to the new.

Neighbor is bitching about the Board.

No details yet, just a message.


This should be good.

My friends are the best.

What am I still doing up?

Oh yeah, I don't have a job.

I have meese

I got a new neighbor upstairs from me in September or so. Younger guy, late 20's (Crap, I'm calling people in their late 20's "younger", next I'll be adding "whipper snapper" to that), has two kids that visit ages 8 and 10 maybe.

I have spent numerous hours at my neighbor's and have heard nothing more than a few squeaks from the unit above them. I have talked to neighbors asking if they can hear the people upstairs. "oh, a few squeaks once in a while".

I have only one conclusion to come to: The guy upstairs from me is part moose. He is in constant motion. I swear he's pacing at high speed. Every time he uses the bathroom he lets the toilet seat slam. It sounds like he's in MY bathroom. Both fortunately and unfortunately I try not to complain. However, I know this is beyond the "norm" when it comes to community living.

Here's a typical evening: He comes in the door stomping off... what? He's been in his car, gets out in the underground garage, walks through the building onto an elevator to the third floor. What could he be stomping off? Then it's heavy walking to the bedroom, to the bathroom (BANG) to the kitchen (SLAM) to the living room and around and around boom-boom-boom and thump and stomp and thud and pound and slam... This will go on for hours. An occasional thump will cause a picture on my wall to shutter. What the frick is going on up there? What is he so busy doing? Can I tell him to just sit down, take a break? Then his kids come over and there are THREE moosies up there, each one taking turns making the rounds.

This past Sunday there was some little kid (I'd imagine it's a baby moose) tearing around making more noise than all of them combined. How can little feet be so heavy? My next door neighbor called me and asked me what was going on, did I hear all that noise? Uh, yeah, I'm watching my ceiling about to cave in. If I had a chandelier the thing would be shaking and swinging.

I was mad and I knew I had to talk to him, let him know there are no moose, mooses or meese allowed. But because I was so mad and frustrated I was afraid I'd say some mean horrible things and then stomp on his feet so he'd be laid up for the next month mending the broken bones. hmmmm....

It took two days and countless drafts of writing a little note to leave if he didn't answer his door. Monday night at about 9 pm I took a deep breath and walked upstairs, note in hand with a little piece of tape for if I needed to leave it. I almost pooped myself as I raised my hand to gently knock. Ohmygod, ohmygod it's too late now. What am I going to do if he answers? I should have brought a paper bag in case I start to hyperventilate. He didn't answer and I got to get away with just leaving the note.

In the note I explained in just a few sentences that his heavy walking, thumping and stomping was disruptive and very loud. I asked him to please be more aware and quiet since the floors/ceilings aren't sound proof. Short and sweet - I hope.

I woke up that night at about 12:30 - 1 from little squeaks in the floor above me but no thumps. Fingers crossed that it becomes the new norm!

Am I the only normal one or am I the only abnormal one?

One of the condo owners is frustrated because we have asked all the units to have a mandatory plumbing inspection in hopes that leaks can be found before they become a major issue costing thousands of dollars. This particular owner is known to go on a rampage and then backs off for several months. Sometimes it's quite entertaining. The thing that I’ve observed is that everyone gets defensive, reacts to her tone and then doesn’t work with her. I’ve learned she’s the type that you have to read between the lines with. You have to listen to her words rather than her tone.

In her letter, she throws in some threat of contacting her attorney, something random about the maintenance man’s salary and “the Board doing just what it wants and, particularly [the president]”

There are a handful of unit owners who simply don’t care for the current president… and more and more, I’m not caring for her much either. She’s gossipy and then plays this innocent role or the sick role or the I’m-just-a-sweet-little-old-women role.

The manager sent the board members a copy of the letter she wanted to send back to this woman in response. I was pretty much appalled by the lack of professionalism not to mention all the typos. This is a reoccurring issue that I have no tolerance for.

In my limited experience and in my education I’ve learned that you don’t respond to an “irate” customer by basically saying they don’t make any sense (even if they don’t). Things like:

“Your comment of conflict of interest makes not sense and I have no idea what
you are referring to.”

“I have communicated with you in the past and will again now regarding
[maintenance man’s] salary. I have no idea how you know what [maintenance
man’s] salary is. Please inform me. What do you think a full time
maintenance person, completing the daily tasks that [maintenance man] does,
should be paid? What legal activity has taken place? What laws are
being broken? I am at a loss as to what you are referencing.”

“What reason would you hire an attorney?”

“What has [president] done that you have an issue with?”

“I am afraid I have many more questions for you that you have for me. If
you would like to elaborate, I can possibly assist you with answers.”

It put me off and I wasn’t the one who would ultimately be on the receiving end of it. She sounded paranoid and unprofessional. So, I made major changes (as the manager is representing us, I will not look foolish!). I was very proud of the end result following this introduction to the attachment:

I “niced” it up a bit. One thing, I would is not even acknowledge her
comment about [president] as it’s obviously some personal issue and I wouldn’t
feed it. I also think asking “what legal actions” or “what laws are being
broken” etc. is unnecessary. I believe they are somewhat empty threats as
she obviously doesn’t have anything to go on. They are just something she
thinks will scare you… for whatever reason. Anyway, that’s my take on
it. Just stick with the facts and not feed her a bunch of questions.
If it continues, you could ask her for some documentation of her concerns. –
Laura

The Looney Tune president responds:

Laura: If [homeowner] has an issue with me, I really don't know what it
could be. I've never personally met her, nor have we ever had any real
personal contact.. The only time I've had any contact with her was when
she came to a board meeting, I called on her and she screamed and hollered
and when [manager] tried to explain things to her, she got up and walked
out. I'm getting the feeling that you think I've had something to do with
all this. I have never had a personal grudge against anyone and even when
they have attacked me personally, I have not responded. It would have put
me at their level. I have talked to and recorded telephone messages from some
residents who have used terrible foul language on me. I have told them
that I would be happy to discuss things with them when they could talk to me
civilly and not swear at me. There is a difference between swearing and
swearing at me and calling me filthy names. I do not have to listen to
that sort of thing, nor do [manager], [maintenance], [company]. No one
does.

WHAT? Did I miss something? I take a deep breath, trying not to call her names and respond:

Dumbarse (okay, not really), you’ve misunderstood. If you reread what I
wrote it says “I would is not even acknowledge her comment about [president] as
it’s obviously some personal issue and I wouldn’t feed it”. How you
interpreted that to mean I think you have something to do with “this” is beyond
me. The personal issues I referred to are [homeowner’s] obvious personal
issues and is taking them out on you… for whatever reason. My opinion is
that feeding into those is just encouragement.

And she comes up the usual:

Sorry, Dear. I did misunderstand. I'm not feeling too sharp and
conseqently seem to take things wrong.

I hate being called “Dear”. And being on the board may drive me to drink heavily.

Still learning life lessons

I ran to Aldi last night at about 6:30 for milk. I'm very excited because they now take all debit and check cards so I will be shopping there more often... but that's beside the point. I was in a hurry because The Biggest Loser was coming on at 7. When I got back into my car at 6:38, nothing happened when I turned the key. My battery was dead.

After a brief period of panic, I called my neighbor (yes, that one). She earned her gold star by coming the half mile to give my battery a jump. At first nothing, that suckah was dead. Once back to my place I backed into my garage stall and it died. It died dead.

My neighbor said to not hesitate to call if I needed her in the morning.

I needed her in the morning.

I hate asking for help. I do everything on my own, by myself. I figure it out and I do it. I refuse to be a helpless female. Unfortunately, I forget that everyone needs help from time to time and it's okay to ask for help and accept help when it's offered. I'm always afraid I'm going to cause people to feel put out.

I waited until 8:10 this morning to call my neighbor. From 7:40 - 8:10 I practically worked my way into a tizzy because I was afraid I'd wake her up, I was afraid she'd feel put out, I was afraid of asking for help.

We got my car going again and I drove the 10 miles to work. All along the way my stomach was doing flips and I was sure that my car would die in the middle of traffic and I'd be one of those people. The ones who are stopped in the middle of a lane with their flashers on while angry drivers are trying to maneuver their way around.

Luckily, I made it without incident and luckily I work at a garage. A battery has been ordered and will be delivered. My car is in a nice warm building and someone will put my new battery in. They will do this without a second thought because they want to help me and they don't see me as a damsel in distress.

One more thing

I forgot to mention in yesterday's post that the president told me she plans on resigning in January. That will make me president. Ummm...

Patting my own back

When I moved into my condo I made a point to attend all of the monthly association meetings. I wanted to a.) get to know my neighbors and b.) understand where the money goes. Well, since an average of four out of 180 units attends, I'm not getting to know the community as quickly as I thought. The other stuff I'm catching on to.

I'm an observer. I sit quietly, mainly unoticed, gathering information about people. I don't do it intentionally, I just do it. It's stemmed from being an incredibly shy child that carried into my twenties. I observe, I get to know personality traits, the good, the bad and the ugly. I had pretty much formed opinions on just about everyone by the sixth month/meeting.

Interestingly, since about the sixth meeting I attended, I started getting approached by the board members to consider running for the board. NO THANKS! was usually my response. I've seen first hand the behavior of the freaks I am surrounded by. Well, they finally broke me in March (after nearly three years) and I'm now the Vice President of the board.

I'm not sure what the Vice President does. Sorry, got to quoting Palin... As VP of the board I really don't have any outlined duties. I've taken it upon myself to write the quarterly newsletters and doing the occasional research for certain projects that are in the works. I do the latter more because I personally don't want to look like an idiot. I want to be able to make informed decisions, not just vote with the others.

The current president is, I believe 73. She is greatly unliked by a large number of owners. I've never gotten to the bottom of this but I am learning about her and now forming my own opinions. Basically, she loves gossip, likes to look out for numero uno and I've actually caught her in a couple of... fibs. (I have a hard time calling a 73 year old woman a liar!). All of this she denies if confronted.

When I decided to run and then actually joined the board I made sure people were aware that I am going to be open minded, fair and hear people out. My opinion is not necessarily the opinion of all. For many years people have become frustrated with the past and current board and have basically given up on trying to get a point across. I feel like I am opening the channels of communication a bit more. It's slow but I'm finding that many of these homeowners who have been labled "trouble" and considered a bit looney are just frustrated... and maybe just a little looney.

Many of these owners just want to be validated and have some sort of acknowledgment that they were heard. This weekend I gathered my courage and called a unit owner that is known to blow up, yell, insult, etc. I was honestly afraid she would bring out the worst in me as I have a low tolerance to that kind of behavior. But, I kept calm and listened and she responded to that, and thanked me (in a round about way) for calling. I poured on the empathy and lightened her foul mood.

I know she still won't be happy with the results of her original concern but at least someone (me) is following up with her. Or I could find the shrubs in front of my building doused with gasoline or my car pushed into the swamp Yes, it's happened there.

Shower curtain

I made myself a shower curtain that matches my bathroom perfectly. It's not busy. It's simple and pretty. The curtain itself is bought. Plain "waffle" texture and I added the ribbon and embellishments. I am very pleased with how it turned out.

On another note, I have a new upstairs neighbor. For the most part it's been fine but he's a heavy walker. I'm hoping that all the commotion is just him settling in (he just moved in this past weekend) because last night, in the evening, the stomping and creaky floor noise went on for over two hours. Dude! Just sit and take a break! Have a pop and popcorn and watch The Biggest Loser! Several times Sam looked at the ceiling with a look of worry, I'm sure wondering if the guy is going to fall through onto our laps. We worry about such things. Luckily, he hasn't...yet.

The beastly board meeting

I am the VP of my condo association. It's not as impressive as it sounds though.

Last night we had our monthly meeting. I mention ages because of the behavior that is exhibited. It helps to understand the absurdity of it all when you know these people are not in Kindergarten. They are usually pretty entertaining although, there hasn't been an instance like last September when a 30-something year old woman pushed down, I say again, PUSHED DOWN, a 60-something year old man.

Anyway, last night my drunk neighbor showed up and sat in on the meeting. She and another man from another one of our buildings chatted through a presentation from a local cable company. I finally spoke up, ask them to please be quite during the presentation. The remainder of the meeting my neighbor stared me down.

This woman is 53 years old. She got drunk, disrupted the meeting and then left in the middle. Meanwhile the man she was talking to sat in the back of the room brushing his greasy hair up in the back.

Next up, the heated argument between the 72? year old President and the 60-something year old secretary. The argument? Landscaping. You know, weeding, watering. Secretary doesn't like the current state of your grounds (agreed) but President is trying to explain we have no, zero, nada, nothing in the budget to pay for someone to come in and do this (agreed). Hence, the constant asking of volunteers to do such jobs. Secretary's face got red and blotchy. President banged on table. Secretary's voice quivered with frustration. It was finally put to rest but not resolved.

I live with these people.

Oh you crazy neighbor you!

I come home at about 7:30 last night, come up the stairs and see Donna (drunken neighbor) passed out in the lobby. She's sitting slumped in a chair just chillin'. I go to my place to drop off my load and as I pass her place the door is wide open. Oh boy.

I go back to her, say her name a couple times and finally gently shake her and finally get a grunt out of her.

Donna: Huh.

Me: Donna, are you okay?

D: Huh (grunt)

Me: Your in the lobby and your apartment door is open. What are you doing?

D: What's this about (she still hasn't opened her eyes or raised her head)

Me: Donna, you're in the lobby. You should go back home. Your door is standing open.

D: (grunt)

Me: Are you going to just stay out here?

D: (grunt)

I walk back to my place go inside and as I'm closing the door I hear her yelling...

D: Darling! Hello? Darling!

I go to her and notice her pants are unzipped. What the hell?

D: I need you to do me a favor. I need you to close up my house.

I tell her I'll close her door for her. I go back, close the door and continue back to my place. As I turn to look down the hall here she comes stumbling along. She says she doesn't have her keys. I tell her I hope it's not locked. I try the knob, it's open and she continues into her apartment.

At least it's quite.

The weekend's over

Friday I met Terri at Chuck-e-Cheese for dinner with her kids. It was so nice to see her after so many years. We caught up on some of the big events from the past 15 years and talked about some old times in high school. (sp?) No awkwardness, just fun.

I got a lot of errands done (ie. spent money I didn't have). But with the errands done I was able to cross a couple things off my "To do" list that I've had going since I moved in.

I decided to pretend I have a green thumb and cut back a houseplant I had in my bedroom. It was huge, touched the ceiling, so I cut it down, way down. It was so top heavy that it was tipping over, I had to prop it in the corner more or less. I cut the main "trunk" which means there is no more leaves on it. There are some closer to the planter. Anyway, I thought this could work, new shoots will sprout eventually. I told my mom about it (I got the plant from her when I moved in because it was too big for their house). She gasped and said "Oh Steve is going to be just sick". I freaked, Why?! Apparently it was his from oh, about 25 years ago. I told her not to tell him yet until I get some information on whether it will grow back. God, I hope so. Pray for my plant.

Okay, good news, I am online at home. It's dial-up but I haven't been able to connect since I moved here. I finally got a land line to connect about 3 weeks ago but I couldn't. I kept getting messages that my ISP couldn't connect to my modem. I tried all the troubleshooting and e-mailed my computer manufacturer for their input. Nothing worked. I finally realized that I downloaded some software for the power pack dealy thingy - it's the only thing that is different from before I moved. I uninstalled and BAM I'm on line! I was so frustrated and now I'm happy.


I also got a start on Spring cleaning. Now, I must settle in for Grey's Anatomy.

Do I celebrate or mourn?

I went to an association meeting last night. The VP comes up to me and says, "I knocked on you door last week. You missed out on all the action". What happened? "Your neighbor died". WHA?

Apparently while I was whoopin' it up in NC the neighbors were whoopin' it up. The cops were called Friday night, they were both wasted (but alive ). Saturday morning they were called back because the man died. He was only 54.

The cops are doing a thorough investigation because of the numerous calls they've had to their place and somehow a rumor started that she killed him.

Amazing the rumors people will start and what people will believe.

So, it's been quite and I've been sleeping very well. And I hate to admit it... okay, I will, I have had a bounce in my step today and I'm a little bit... dare I say, giddy! Of course, I didn't want him to die, it is actually shocking and sad news and I feel badly for the woman because I'm sure she loved him. However, I found out they weren't married and she wasn't mentioned in his obit. Hm.

It's incredible, the things you're witness to when so many different lifestyles are living under one roof (community living).