Gimme a job

It turns out that my confidence is quickly dwindling. I have two more severence checks and then I'll be collecting unemployment. This job search thing is for the birds. I have the education, I have the experience. Why can't I get a job? I know it's like this all over the place and I probably won't find a job that paid me as well as what I previously had. Fine. I don't even have to do anything related to what I used to do. Just give me a job.