No more confusing alone with lonely and isolation

Still feeling a little empty but have come to several realizations.

I'm trying to get back to the way I was before "him" but without the bitterness.

I don't want to go back to the way I was, pretending I didn't need what I received from this "relationship".  Pretending I wasn't lonely.  Pretending I didn't care. 

I think I've managed to hit all the stages of grief several times.  Shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance, and carb binging.

Today I was motivated and got some of my flowers purchased and some of the container planting done on my balcony.  (clarification: I didn't plant the containers IN my balcony, I planted flowers IN the containers ON my balcony).